To keep going when I don’t feel like it and other random thoughts

Well, it’s Tuesday again – it means the weekend has come and gone and I am AGAIN trying to recover from it. You see, weekends are very hard for me, I struggle to keep track of my eating, and I don’t exercise, usually, because we get out and about and time flies when you are having fun.

This weekend in particular was hectic. My husband auditioned for the X-Factor program (I have mixed feelings about it) and he got through to the second audition – but he won’t find out what the outcome is until April. Reality TV is not reality really, this audition thing is a four part process – it makes you wonder how those really bad singers get on TV? 

After he was back, we went swimming, and got invited for a dinner bbq – which was good until dessert came. I had some. It was Ambrosia, one of my favourites!

On Sunday though, we all went to a Brazilian restaurant (I am Brazilian, my siblings live here and my parents are here in Australia visiting). That place is a diet killer. All you can eat Brazilian barbeque for $50 (cheap for Perth standards). And the food is amazing. So we get to eat a lot of different kinds of meat, including one of my favourites, chicken hearts (don’t judge until you try it – it’s delicious!) By the time we had finished there, everyone was ready for a nap, haha!

To be honest I am not really trying hard enough and I hate myself for it. I am still trying to lose the same three kilos I have put on over the holidays. I really want to be consistent and at the same time not be paranoid about what is happening around me, what others are eating or cooking, and I don’t like saying no to desserts. Is this lack of will? I am not saying I want to binge eat on everything under the sun…. I guess I am still trying to find a balance for myself. It takes times and it is not easy.

But we keep pressing on. It’s a very discouraging, slow process sometimes. But the hope of success renew itself every time we slip up.

I wish it was as easy as taking diet pills! And NO, I am not even tempted to go down that road

I have to keep looking back and focus on what I have achieved already! I am running for goodness sake! Never in my life I ran before! This time last year I was 10kgs heavier, not doing any form of exercise and not caring about how many times I had McDonalds in a week

Progress is the KEY word here. We often keep focusing on what we are not achieving. Maybe that’s human nature, but we have to purposely make a decision to celebrate how far we have come.

Also, I want to find an eating plan to make life easy. With a full time job, three kids, a husband, a running partner, I don’t really have a lot of time to fiddle with a lot of stuff.

So today I am researching, reading a lot, thinking.

Running: From a beginner’s perspective

I like running. I am by no means an expert on running, or claim to know the secret to becoming a runner. But I can share my personal experience and hope it can inspire someone out there.

It all started about 14 weeks ago. I was stuck in a rut, unhappy about my weight, about my fitness, about my life in general. I have three kids and a full time job, life is hectic to say the least. One evening, I decided that instead of collapsing on the couch after the whole ‘dinner/clean-up/kids to bed’ routine, I was going to go for a walk. Huge step right there since I hadn’t done any walking in 5 months. Because it was dark, I asked my 10 year old daughter to come with me, the plan was to walk around the cul-de-sac we live in, for half an hour. Simple enough, I could do that.

After about fifteen minutes, my daughter dared me to run until the end of the road – about 100 metres. I thought to myself: ‘How hard can it be?’ So I started to run and my lungs screamed in protest, my legs turned into jelly and then I had the confirmation that yes, I was VERY unfit. I could not run the full 100 metres by the way. I stopped after 25 seconds of agony.

That moment stayed with me, I was determined to get fit! So I met up with a friend, who had just run her first half-marathon, and we had a conversation that sparkled something in me. She told me her running story, how she was like me when she first started (maybe not as bad, haha) but she told me that she could only run 250 metres when she started. Then she started to tell me that the secret is not to give up. Start small and the first step is the hardest. Consistency is the key. After that conversation, she convinced me that I could be a runner too. After laughing at the thought at first, I decided I was going to try, I had nothing to lose. 

But what I did have was a list of reasons not to try: ‘I am too fat’, ‘people will laugh at me’, ‘I don’t have running shoes’, ‘I am too tired to run by the time I get home from work’ etc. Endless excuses. But you know what excuses are? EXCUSES!! I just adopted the ‘robot style’ approach to my excuses. No thinking involved, I just needed to get out there and just freaking do it. I shared my plan with another friend and convinced her to join me. So I downloaded the C25K app on my phone and we started Week 1 Day 1.
I won’t lie and say it was easy, because it was one of the hardest things I had to do. The key for me was to push myself mentally when my body wanted to stop. And also NEVER give up trying. Slow progress is progress. Don’t expect to be able to run 5ks overnight but I was amazed on how fast my fitness level improved and how I was able to run for 20 minutes non-stop for the first time on week 5. I felt I could do anything after that!

This was the craziest decision of my life. I always used to joke that if anyone see me running, call the police because I am being chased. But there is no better feeling than after you finish your run, sore legs, smiling from ear to ear, to be able to say ‘I did it’. 

I am only beginning this journey – a beginner by all means. I cannot run 5ks just yet, but I will get there. And seriously, if I can do it, ANYONE can! I was one of those people who thought I just wasn’t a runner. But I am standing at the other side telling you: You can run! The first step is the hardest one, but once you take it, you will never regret it.

Running Sparkle

I am sitting here at work reading articles about running, success stories about people that became runners, going to running forums, researching running in general (yes, quiet day at work…)

At the same time time I caught myself thinking that I am indeed going crazy!

But am I? 

It’s very hard to try and explain this sparkle that came alive inside me 12 weeks ago. How one day I got out of bed and decided that I was going to start running. To be honest, I didn’t have a reason to start, I hadn’t even gone for a walk in months. 

But I took that first crazy step. I hated it. Running hurts, I couldn’t breathe! I could barely finish the C25K Week 1 Day 1. The whole time I was doing it, I just wanted to finish. But when I did finish, I experienced the most amazing feeling: I had actually run – I was hooked

So I kept going for runs. That does not mean it became easier straight away, because it didn’t. But I kept going through the pain and my mind was the one responsible for finishing the run, not my body. If I had listened to my body I would have given up (no injuries involved here, just unfitness to the maximum)

Now I just want to run! I have caught the running bug, only runners really understand what this is like. I just want to see how far I can if I keep pushing myself. I want to race. 

I really hope this bug is contagious and everyone gets infected, and I also hope I never recover from it